Time Pass

Classes these days, the few that do take place, are boring.
Philology, which goes without saying, just IS.
And Scansion is boring, because...well, I can’t do it.

My question is, why anyone would need to study either of them. No one is going to be asked to scan a passage, in any corner of the world, or discuss the Greek, Latin, French or whatever other country’s influence on the English language, unless you’re planning to teach them to unsuspecting students.

Right now, I’m trying/pretending to study, which basically means there’s a couple of Google tabs open. But all I can think about is a bunch of things I really want to do.

I want to go to New Market and shop, for ribbons, lingerie, food and clothes.

I want to be a pro at 29.

I want to go to Princep Ghat and just hang out.

I want to go sit on a beach, with my hair open, the sand under me, and feel the water lapping at my toes.

I want to ride a bike, a really fast one, and feel the wind in my face.

I want to roam around Park Street at 2am in the night.

I want to stick my head outside a car window, and leave my tongue hanging out like a dog.

I want to stop thinking about that one guy, and just figure out whether I like him or not.

I want to be tall, and have bigger feet, and to not fit into clothes from the kids section.

I want to have enough money to buy all the books I want.

And the time to read them.

I want to learn to figure skate, and to ballroom dance.

I want to climb a tree again, and sit on a branch, while I dangle my legs.

I want to stand in the rain and dance.

I want to be as pretty as Leighton Meester.

I want to eat all I want, and not worry about growing fat.

I want classmates I can talk to.

I want to be able to write as well as my friends.

I want to stop feeling so goddamned lonely all the time.

I have exams in two weeks.

I will go study now.

Leave

"All this time I was wasting
Hoping you would come around
I've been giving out chances every time
And all you do is let me down.

And it's taken me this long
Baby but I figured you out
And you're thinking we'll be fine again
But not this time around."


I wish you'd leave.
Stop calling.
Stop texting.
Stop talking.


Be either the friend.
Or the lover.
Or maybe, even both.


Just make up your mind.
And tell me what you want.
Or better yet, tell yourself what you want.


"You had me falling for you honey
And it never would've gone away, no
You used to shine so bright
But I watched all of it fade."



I'll live.
And so will you.
We'll both be cowards, but who cares..?
We'll find other people, but it won't be the same.


"But you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore.

And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before
You're not sorry."


And maybe this time, you'll ask me before somebody else does.

Presi's Poshus..

Presidency College is an extremely interesting observational ground..this I have observed in the past few weeks that I have been here. I never really expected to make it to this college, but since I did, I figured its best if I made the most out of my time here. Coming back to my point-- Presi gives me a lot to write about..

I shall start with the dogs here..

there's too many of them. There's one in Pramod Da's canteen and his name is 'Goopy' which is pronounced 'Goop-ey'.. Goopy is an extremely weird dog who rarely ever moves..except when one of us has tiffin *yes, some of our classmates still get tiffin* Goopy comes out of his stupor to finish off the rooti-bhendir torkari..

Another dog, or better, another bitch, has recently given birth to puppies *duh*.. These puppies are really cute and the girls at Presi are always seen with these puppies..though their bitch of a mom is never there.

These puppies have turned into a bit of a threat for the boys of our college since the girls spend more time with them than with the boys. Everybody should take very good note of the pup with the open mouth-- one of the girls in my class, who is the most adorable 'poshu' that Presidency has, commented "He shall be the conqueror." We didnt really investigate whether the 'conqueror' is a He or a She..but based on the extreme uncouth way he's yawning we just took it for granted the conqueror is a 'He'..

*no offence meant to the males*

Speaking of Presi's poshus, I cannot possibly leave out the one I have mentioned earlier. She is, undeniably, the most lovable poshu I, or anyone for that matter, will ever hope to come across. With her caustic wit and an absolutely infectious smile she gives us one-liners that could put some of the best creative minds to shame. Following are excerpts from our conversations:

Me: We don't necessarily HAVE to vote, do we..?

Person 1: I guess not.. You could just go in and do an inki-pinki-ponki thingy na..?

Person 2: But what if you vote for the wrong party? One that does nothing..?

Her: Ekhane shob party i ek..keu chokh maare, toh keu lok maare.

Prof: *very boring lecture*

Her: Oof ki hoyeche? Sir er ki chai? Aami bolchi Sir er biye dite hobe, chol chanda tuli..

Person 3: Pritam used to be in this college, you know?

Person 2: The music composer?

Person 4: You mean music chor.

Her: Pritam.. you should call him Preety-Aam..

Person 4: You like that guy na?

Me: No. Either way he's got a girlfriend. The dude's taken.

Her: So what if he's taken.? Take him again.

Person 5: Amar nail polish ta kemon bol na?

Her: Joma rokto te haath dobale je rokom dekhte hoy.

Her: Aaj amar khub dukhho..purono flame jege uthechhe.

Her future life decisions include marriage plans after three years.
And a small tea shack where 'aantel' people come for tea, and intellectual discussions, which she will listen to, while making tea.
And a beauty parlour, duly named 'Mona Lisa Booty Parlour.'

Intriguing..

Yet totally adorable.

Gone..

Reality is a question of perspective; the further you get from the past, the more concrete and plausible it seems -- but as you approach the present, it inevitably seems incredible.

Salman Rushdie

I finished a book a couple of days ago..'An Improper Proposal' it was named..one of those sugary sweet novels about a girl and a thirty-something man and their romantic interludes..with a fair bit of very graphic sex scenes thrown in..I absolutely hated it..but the reason I started to read it--even though I knew the hero and heroine were going to end up together-- was Betu.

Who's that..you ask..? She was my oldest friend..and one of my best..and she loved romance novels..She had an entire stack of Mills and Boon novels and I never really understood her affinity for the trash..Not that trash was all she read..She read books of all kinds..from philosophy to science fiction to murder mysteries..But the real reason I decided to start my first (ever!) blog entry about her is:

I miss her.

She passed away earlier this year..16th January 2009 to be exact..and it was the most shocking news I've heard till date..I had no idea 1 phone call could change me so drastically..but it did..And in those three days..when I clung to the hope that she might come back, I grew up..

She didnt come back..and my last sight of hers was from outside the glass thing they put her in..covered in a white shroud and surrounded by flowers..That's not how I remember her, though..she was always the one I went to whenever I just needed to talk..and talk, we did..we've had some of the weirdest conversations ever..starting from boys (I got over Edward!) to cake (yeah, she taught me how to bake)..

One of my favourite places in the world was her room..where there was always plenty of food, John Mayer, Hector(her Dachshund), all those books and her..There I found security, a knowledge that no matter what I did, she wouldnt judge and a sense of freedom..because between us, there was never any pretence or lies..

We were just..Us.

To this day, I wish there was a way she could come back..but then again, life doesnt always give you what you want, does it..?

P.S: If there's a God..and for your sake I hope there is..please give her all the romance novels she wants..or you'll have me to deal with..